Sunday, February 04, 2007

I Believe

Woodpecker eating on a new suet feeder.

Woodpecker dropped and flew off.

Accident on Parks Highway today.

I woke up several times ---early this morning. Finally, I got up to go to the bathroom and it was light enough to look out the window. I could see nothing! The fog was thick as cotton. I said a prayer for the people driving on the highways because I knew it had to be hard to see. I said another one as I got ready for church when I began to hear the fire trucks and emergency vehicles responding somewhere on the highway.

As Doug drove us to church we saw an ugly accident. I said a prayer for the family going through this horror so early in the morning. Not that the time of day makes any accident or trauma any worse or any easier to take, it just seemed a horrible way to begin the day.

We drove past a helicopter waiting to fly the accident victim or victims to medical help. I prayed they would be safe as they flew there. Then my thoughts returned to my dear sister.

It's been forty days since the aneurysm happened to Millie and the thoughts of what is to come for her still fill my mind and my other sisters and brothers minds.

I don't worry.

I am not worried. Am I worried to wonder about her situation?

I learned in church this morning that when we worry we are being disobedient to God's words, "Do not worry..." I have questioned myself today. Am I worrying to wonder where and how Millie will be in the next days, weeks, months and possibly years as she works to return to how we knew her before this?

I find that it is easy to put her well-being into His hands. I know without a shadow of doubt that if He wanted to she could be healed right now. She could wake up and be totally restored. I don't believe that my believing hard enough will change her circumstances.

If I have to believe harder, isn't that putting the miracle of her healing back into my own power? If I don't believe hard enough, then she won't be healed. So now, it does not depend on God, but it depends on how hard I believe that she will be healed.

Does God's Word mean that here on Earth we all will be perfectly healthy? Or does all this scripture speak of a time that I don't totally understand? Maybe it's referring to one day in the future?

I believe that one day long time ago in mankind's history something went dreadfully wrong, then we were thrown into a downward spiral with brought us sickness, unhappiness, and eternal death in this earthly life. Then, just like a super hero story, Jesus Christ came to Earth, lived, died and then rose again and through all His sacrifice, we will get there--- to the next life where we shall see total healing and restoration.

I know there are times in this life that God shows His mighty power. I have read stories of it. I believe He does this in this world to show those without His written Word that the story of His Son, Jesus Christ is the Truth! We have the written Word of God and He requires of us that we believe His Story in order to enter into the eternal life He has secured for all people.

I believe Jesus Christ's story.

If my sister should be restored to us fully and immediately, there would be such rejoicing in the lands of her family and friends! Praises would be given to our Creator. If she isn't, there will continue to be faith in God, in Jesus Christ that someday, not only she will be restored, but we all will be restored to what mankind was created for---- full and total fellowship with God Himself! This is what I believe.

Adam said that Millie will be moved from Swedish Medical Center to another hospital about 15 minutes from there, Regional Hospital. Her daughters Debbie and Courtney will be flying home to Alaska Monday evening. Debbie will be visiting her family up here before returning to her family in Maryland in a week. Please pray for their safe travels. Millie was taken off of antibiotics but is put back on that IV when she began to run a fever. Adam also said Millie needed more anesthesia for her last surgery than she needed previously (shunt surgery) so they said that shows she is more aware of her body. She continues to move a lot more!

40 days.


Constance said...

When I read your posts, I feel so connected to you and we've never even met face to face! That's the beauty of being in Christ!

I totally understand where you are coming from. In my own situation, I asked for a healing miracle. I totally trusted God that He could do it. When it didn't happen and I had to go through the surgery and my situation has remained the same, I got angry with God and questioned why I even pray?

I have come to see my situation through different eyes, eyes of gratitude. I read in Rick Warren's book, "The Purpose Driven Life" how God filters what comes into our lives through His hands. He allows things to come to us, in order to help us grow more in the image of His precious Son. I got a deep sense of comfort from that. For some of us, it takes one thing, for others, it's something different.

In the Beth Moore Daniel study this past Fall, she made a point about the fiery furnace trial that the 3 young captives faced.

When God delivers us FROM the fire, our faith is built.

When God delivers us THROUGH the fire, our faith is refined.

When God delivers us BY the fire, straight into His arms, our faith is perfected.

I have been angry and hurt by some close friends and family, who act like my lack of healing is my own fault. Like I don't pray hard enough, believe hard enough, I spoke something negative, etc. I like what you said how when we have that mindset the focus is on us and not God.

Still praying for Millie and her family.


Connie Marie said...

So we know how to respond to people that are sick now and have been praying to be healed because we have gone through the "fire" when those who feel they have a stronger faith can tell us that we don't have faith enough, otherwise we would have been healed by now.

I went through the same faith shaking test when I was praying ernestly to be healed of my physical problem too, but I was not healed.

I am not angry with people about it. I know we are surrounded by people that are still working out their own faith. We all finally learn a thing or two and then it's time to leave this place!!

Kerri said...

It's hard to believe it's been 40 days. Then there are times when it feels like it's been 400 days since I last spoke to her, when in reality it has been 41. Well, I guess 42 by now.

((((Connie)))) I'm praying for you all.